Lady Ponder

A blog for the real and contemporary woman

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I want to be a ballerina

I wake up

I go to the window and open it….breath in the fresh air as I sip on my morning coffee.

I smell nature, and I taste bliss.

Basic, simple but pure contentment is what I feel.

I want to be a ballerina.

I know it sound weird considering I am 32. But I use to want to be a ballerina when I was 10. Because back then for me it meant:

  1. Carefree
  2. Dancing through life
  3. Moving with grace and beaming light
  4. Living a purposeful life, and doing what I love
  5. Enjoying and appreciating the simplicity but beauty in everything
  6. It meant pink, light, beauty and joy

So yeah….I still want to be a ballerina. Not literally anymore (well actually I wouldn’t mind to literally be a ballerina but obviously I’m a tad too old, and maybe a bit on the heavy side, oh and not nearly as flexible as required).

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I’m 32, I have  2x 3 year diplomas in business management and PR, my whole life I have been the entrepreneur, at any given time I have a full-time job and at least 2 or 3 business ventures, I have always been “successful”, highly corporate and serious…..all of which are actually completely meaningless in this life!

Last week I was browsing through a magazine, and this article heading caught my attention, it said……”I’m in a light stage of my life, I want to laugh allot”. That was my fist sign. Then Sunday in church the sermon was about experiencing the pure joy in the little things like children do. That was my confirmation that it’s time for a complete metamorphosis.

As I look back over the years and many phases of my life, I realize how each stage, success, stumble, triumph and heartache has had a significant impact on where I stand right now. And as I continue to step more fully into myself each day and bring to light my mission of living a simple joyful life, I have come to the conclusion that it’s all about back to basics.

Happiness comes from within. I have spent way too much of my life looking for outside validation and approval that eludes me. Turns out, it’s been an inside job all along.

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I have never believed and understood the statement that “people don’t change”, that’s nonsense, I have seen it may times. Everyone experiences major life metamorphosis throughout life, even after you’re all grown up, your identity isn’t fixed, and the choice is always ours.

Age is just a number, but the higher it gets, the more wisdom and life experience I’ve amassed. I am 32 years old, and only now I can Own it! Only now do I begin to understand the TRUE meaning of life, my true purpose, and it doesn’t have anything to do with money or success or social image.

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Our ancestors understood it, but somehow over time we just forgot our purpose living in the grind. Our ancestors greeted the sun each morning, enjoyed simple home-cooked meals, played with their children and grandchildren, and delighted in a beautiful sunset, with no television to lure them inside on a beautiful summer evening. Our bodies were, and still are, designed to be in tune with the sun, the moon, the seasons, and the cycles of nature. That simplicity is what our souls long for. So our adaption to the “modern age” has been fraught with peril to our peace of mind and our health.

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Oh I am a philosopher, and although It’s fine to spend time philosophizing about lofty ideals, how does that help me if I cannot enjoy something as simple as a cup of tea, or a sunset, or delight in watching a child laugh from their tummies?

Living a peaceful, fulfilling life may to some seem like a “lesser” life, but they are wrong, I was there too, and it’s not less important, it is the root of happiness, and joy, it is sacred.

So me…Im going to make a conscious effort to be more childlike. I want to laugh more. I want to stop rushing through mornings and days, to simply go to bed and do the same tomorrow. I’m going to BE in the moment, and appreciate its beauty and oh I’m going to laugh more, and hard and extravagantly, the way children do, because they certainly know how to live in the moment.

I’m going to become a ballerina!

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Cindy Breet • August 29, 2016


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